Oh, the blank page to greet me once again. Like so many times before… We meet again, beautiful ! Are you ready to record my thoughts ?
I’ll go on rumbling about nothing. So if you want to save some time, this is your chance to Ctrl + F4 my mind.
I’m in a new chapter of my life. One chapter that is a bit more organized and in which I know myself a little better. Actually a whole lot better. I have a pretty good idea on who I am, what I want, how to get it and in all this process to have the right attitude and approach. Needless to say, I’m still living the „no regrets” period. Every single event or experience that happened came with a valuable lesson and new perspective. Every single stubborned attitude and refuse to do the right thing led me towards the inevitable acceptance of „what is”. I thought I know how to live in the present. I didn’t. I thought I know who I was. I didn’t. My world has been shattered and rebuilt once again. But as somebody told me … „I don’t have all the answers.” That’s right. I don’t. But I have the right attitude, I can admit when I.m wrong, I’m willing to fail and I’m open to learn. Life is no longer about other people. Life is about me. I.m starting to no longer take my happiness from other people, events or things and I’m starting to find this, deep inside me. And it’s more than just happiness. It’s an undisturbed-ripples-on-the-surface-of-the-ocean-inner-peace. ( yeah, that’s a word. I just made it up ! ). Things don’t bother me the way they did. Reactions, words, overreactions have no power on my mood. I’ll let you know my piece of mind, but you no longer have the power to control my mood. As I said, my world has been shattered. And is about to be shattered once more. Two months, two weeks and twelve days from now, I will no longer be the same person that’s writing this message. Does it saddens me ? Yes. Yes, it does. Can I stop it ? Yes, yes I can. But I won’t. I no longer fight the cycles of nature and evolution. Each and every one of us go through good and bad periods in life. Some lasting longer, some shorter. Resistance is futile. Accept what is and adapt to this cycle. Yes, you lost your job. Feel that pain, get up and move on. You lost your wallet or your house. Feel the pain, man up, adjust your mind and move on. You went to the best vacation of your life. Appreciate it, take it in and move on. Don’t dwell on the the past and don’t think about the future. It’s the best playground to miss the present. Remember that „life is 10% of what happens and 90% of how we react to it” ? Well, it’s true. Wanna hear another good one ? The eternal battle between heart and brain ? I’ve found my answer and I’m no longer doubting the choices I make. Hence, the no-regrets. ( Did I lose you ? Are you still following ? Here’s your other chance to Ctrl + F4 my mind. Nothing good comes next ). I.ve also discovered two sides of me that are in a constant battle and depleted me of energy. I.ve learnt to manage them and feed the right wolf. And it’s working in my favor now, not against me. I still have reminisces of my old self and sometimes they come out to play. I smile upon their game and move on with the right wolf in control. (wolf ?! what the hell did he smoke? It doesn’t make any sense. Follow-up with me afterwards and see that it does. Just bear with me. ) (Seriously ?! … now bears ?! wtf …)
I told you I’ll say nothing with the message above and yet if you’re in the right period of your life you see the words beneath the words and smile. Or just smile because nothing makes sense. 🙂
In all the seriousness, a heavy, deep, emotional and challenging chapter is about to end and a new one is set to begin. It scares the shit out of me, I have no control over it and I know nothing about it. Yet I smile and embrace the unknown. I can feel its cold gusts and warm embraces. One thing comes to mind and it turns the chaos into a positive bring-it-on peace. „Sun is chirping, birds are shining. The water is wet… Life is good sweetheart. Life is good ! ”
P.S. I bet you’re wondering why the umbrella, right ? 🙂